Toxic Positivity:The pseudo psychology to catfish our mental health

So just about recently,I was researching on the worldwide Happiness Quotient Index,which indicates the global happiness quotient amongst people across the world. As recently as March 2022,the happiest country in the world is Finland which has straight out,for 5 times in a row been rated as the Global No.1 happiest country and India ranks 136th in the global rankings.(Source:dmerharyana.org,2022).

The above data clearly states that India does not have many happy citizens living in her country.Generally,we as humans are conditioned to debunk negative emotions that crop up in the mind. So this brings me to question what is toxic positivity? As per a renowned therapist from NYC and a community member of MyWellbeing,Ms.Alice Rizzi;"Toxic positivity contributes to an all or nothing approach which is a distorted assumption that things either have to be all good or all bad".

She goes on further to add,"No one is 100% happy all the time and nor should they be.Humans are multi-faceted and experience complex emotional states."

Let us look at the picture above,it clearly denotes a person who is in deep emotional pain or is undergoing traumatic thoughts, yet putting up a smile and pretending everything is alright. This is what toxic positivity is. Toxic positivity creates a strong invalidation of pain and negative feelings that lead to secondary emotions of sadness,guilt,embarassment and shame. So this brings me to the next question, Does toxic positivity impact our mental health? A most definite yes it does! Toxic positivity discourages full expression of human emotion by labelling certain feelings as "bad feelings","unacceptable behaviour" and the works.Thus,this results in suppression of negative feelings that in the long run,develops us to judge ourselves for experiencing any bad feelings. Additionally,the mind trains itself,overtime,full of negative thoughts and not speaking up the truth when we are hurt,angry or sad.

Dismissing and masking negative emotions can create thought of shame which activates stress responses such as heart palpitations,pupil dilations and sweat production. Further,the enabler forces unhealthy coping mechanisms and tends to increase internalization of struggles that lead to never ending cycles. The bottling up of negative feelings to just remain positive can have a plethora of negative impact,some of which include social isolation,loss of self-esteem,use of substance abuse.

Yet another major red flag of toxic positivity includes a strong level of ignorance of pain and subsiding negative thoughts,ignorance overtime leads to depression,anxiety and feelings of lack of worthiness. This further,leads to unhealed trauma and emotional wounding.

Psychologist Carl Jung said it best;"What you resist not only persists but will grow in size". So when we bottle up our emotions,we usually do not realise at all that we are experiencing them.A person only bottles up his or her emotions if they feel ashamed of feeling those certain set of uncomfortable feelings. Shame debilitates the human spirit. In this article, I will share a few ways in which you can eliminate toxic positivity:

#1 Be authentic.

#2 Do not bottle up your genuine feelings.

#3 Practice unconditional self-acceptance.

#4 Allow yourself to feel multiple emotions at once.

#5 Have self-compassion.

#6 Practice journaling.

#7 Take a break from social media.

#8 Validate your emotions and feelings.

#9 Speak to a confidante or a mental health practitioner.

The above are just a few key takeaways on how we can eliminate toxic positivity from our mind and surroundings.However,we need to understand that leading with an unfeigned mindset will help us get over toxic positivity.